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i love how God is always thinking of me and dropping little presents my way. i didn’t really ever pay attention or appreciate that until just now. the reality hit me: what a great Lover he is to be doing those things, whether it’s giving me confirmation about decisions or pointing me to passages I need to hear or articles I need to read. it is such a display of, “See I was thinking of you,” “See, I saw this and thought of you,” “Here, I knew you needed this.” it is quite the lovespell He’s weaving…

I get excited when michael sends me an unexpected text that says, “thinking of you.” if a friend sends me a letter in the mail, it touches my heart. and those are things that only occur occassionaly, not on the consistent basis that i’m used to receiving these sorts of things and revelations from God. and yet i never stop to think of how flattering and loving and deep, down rich it is the way that God speaks to me.

and i don’t even notice or appreciate it.

i know He’s God and maybe he’s “supposed” to do that, being all powerful and all knowing everything, but that’s a pretty crappy and disrespectful and unappreciative and non-fearing way to view the generosity and grace he delivers to us, lovingly and thoughtfully, day after day.

here’s how i finally realized this truth: lately I’ve been thinking about how i spend my time and how i want to make more time for God but how that’s been just so darn hard lately. i try but seem to always be “failing.” michael and i even talked about having our devotions at the same time so that we could hold each other accountable and talk on the phone afterward and not let our own phone conversations get in the way of each other’s time with the Lord.

then, i was working late and catching up on some reading for work and (one of the many cool things about working in a Christian company) I was reading “Bible Study magazine” and right there, on the opening pages was one of those tied-up-with-a-bow, just-because presents that God, who truly is the ultimate Lover and Pursuer and Wooer of our hearts, gave:

an article called “Finding Time for God.” it was from a young mom who talked about how hard it is to make time for God. but she came upon a perspective that changed her view of devotions, in that we often think that it’s up to us when it comes to growing closer to Christ. now, don’t get me wrong, part of it does. we are told to step out in faith and i believe that applies to every way we live out our faith–including the time we spend with God. the difference, though, is that it’s not wholly on us. because we have a God who is a gentleman and will meet us where we are and once we step up in faith, he will fling open the door wildly and invite us into great and mighty things. he is a God who “specializes in making something out of nothing,” a la the loaves and fish. we know that because He is a God who loves to give and be generous and be merciful, that he will take our paltry offerings and multiply them beyond our wildest imaginations. because that is His nature. even if it’s only a few moments that we have to give, He will take them and He will multiply them and make the impossible possible. because the reality is that because he is so good, we can never give enough. it will always be too little, whether it’s minutes or hours or days or years. He deserves infinitely more than we can ever give.

but that’s OK. because when we have confidence in who he is and believe that He will merciful and bless those offerings, then those few minutes can become so much more than we ever thought possible. because that’s our God!

that was the little gift God bestowed to me today–one page in one magazine. but for the first time, I got a glimpse, a real, hearty glimpse, into the depth and the height and the width of His love for me. I’m heartened.

welcome back.

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yes i’ve been gone.

no i don’t have any excuses. just that i’ve let “busy” become my middle name.

yes i miss you. yes i miss the revelations i used to come by so easily. yes i’m praying my little heart out for those to return. and for me to return. 

if you’re still here, thank you! i will try to meet you again soon…

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